115. a teacher (to be)

it feels so good 

to be in the house of the Lord..

so much of love, encouragement and joy..

they are what i need all these while..

the work of the darkness is in progress..

all the time..

and it took this seminar to wake me up..again...

to realise how i've forgotten His promises..

******

the message today..

teacher plays a very significant part in a student's life..

the testimony of how

a teacher who imparts love

impacted the life of a naughty boy

who is now a pastor..

wouldn't it be the greatest award and achievement 

when you know that as a teacher

you have touched the life of someone..

someone who might have been regarded by others as

stupid, hopeless, rubbish..?

******

this is my calling for now..

as a future teacher..

things might change in the future..

who knows what is prepared for me..

even though things are not easy now..

but i'm sure there's reasons 

as to why i was even sent here..

a place i've never thought i would be in..

in a year,

i would have graduated..

and be an official teacher in schools..

but somehow

 i still don't quite see myself as one..

i'm not prepared..

i have so many doubts in me..

how am i going to handle my class and students??

where will i be posted??

in rural areas far from home??

or in the comfort zone near my hometown??

it's kind of scary..

going to school for real soon

with so many doubts in me..

and all i can do is to trust the One..

for He knows what is best for me

for He has planned every detail of my life 

even when i was still in the womb..

but

trusting and committing everything is

much easier said than done though..

sorry Lord for i doubt too much..

that i try to take things into my own control..

and forgetting that You are the one who is in control 

of EVERYTHING!!

please help me deal with these doubts, O Lord..