85. December and Spain

this has been one of the busiest 2 weeks since i started my term...

- working part time in Royal Mail from 2pm to 10pm almost everyday

- studying for my exam

- reading for my assignment and dissertation

- writing up my assignment

but thank God with His mercy and grace i am still coping well..

with only 3 hours of sleep yesterday, i survived the 12-long-and-never-seemed-to-end working hours..God is indeed merciful..and that was how i ended my last day of work in Royal Mail..

and the end of term is also finally here!!!

so..my next destination is..

~SPAIN~!!

a well-deserved 4 day after the hard work..

note: a time to polish and wash my eyes with good looking gentlemen..(that's the comment i heard from many about guys in Spain...shall see it for myself)

84.little one..

"thank you for the help"

is probably the best gift

i could get from a student..

for now...

you (the little quiet girl)

will never know how powerful that sentence of yours was..

to make me realised

how meaningful it is to be a future teacher..

thank you, little one..

83. smiles

82. promises

promises are made to be kept..

if not why bother making them..

81. blue moon

why is it that things are always one-sided?

why do you have to win all the time?

and i really mean all the time!!

aren't others worth the respect as well?

don't we deserve even a tiny bit of respect??

you always expect us to be considerate..

and we gave in because we respect you..

but have you tried considering our needs

and to try to accommodate us?

maybe you did try...

but once in a very very blue moon!!

80.randomness_2

a simple surprise does great miracle to an upset heart..

79. randomness_1

~i secretly do that subconsciously~

78. randomness

77. please go..

please move on, will you?

so that i can move on as well..

i can't help hanging on to the little hope i have..

and i need you to move on

so that i can face the ugly truth on my own..

sadness for awhile

but a blessing in the future...

76. hating it

i hate it!!

when i subconsciously look through your profile..

it brings back all the hurt and the feeling of being used..

i hate it!!

when i do it again and again

even though i know how much pain it will cause me..

i hate it!!

when i find myself giving in..

when my actions make me appear weak..

75. cherishes

"Start cherishing the one that cherishes you.

Not the one that took you for granted.."

74. determination vs desperation

73. not worth it

i could have been angry at what you have done..

but instead i thank you for it..

you have opened up my eyes to see who you really are..

and you are definitely not worth my time..

72. Need You Now..

and i wonder if i ever crossed your mind..

for me it happens all the time..

guess i rather hurt than feel nothing at all..

71. forgetting

why is it so easy for me to forget things that i want to remember,

important dates and daily plannings...

but when it comes to things i am ready to forget,

it haunts me in every way...

the more i am ready to forget,

the harder it is.

the more i want to put it behind me,

the more often they say hi to me..

as if saying "hey we are still here!!"

it requires too much effort to forget these things..

perhaps i should try to forget the idea of forgetting them..

"waiting is painful. forgetting is painful.

but not knowing which to do is the worse kind of suffering."

~Paulo Coelho~

70. letting go

it was so much easier then..

why can't it be as easy as before..

perhaps this is different..

but then again..as different as it seems,

it might have the same ending...

69. guidance

i often ask Him for guidance

and all i have to do is trust Him..

i believed His promises but when things get tough,

i ever so often doubt if He is there to guide me..

i often thought that i was working hard,

but i forgot that He works even harder for me,

planning my every thoughts and actions

and loving me despite everything..

~TRUST IN THE LORD WITH ALL YOUR HEART~

68. once again

just when i thought i have managed to break down that wall,

another wall greeted me..

this time, it is much greater than the one before...

will i be able to bring it down this time?

only He knows..

only He can help me through it..

i put my trust and hope only in Him

for He always provides me with the best..

67. of wall

i don't know what to do

when the wall stands between me and my future..

i know i shouldn't in any way see this as a barrier

but instead a time for me to be closer with the Author of my life..

"Some times people put up walls, not to keep people away.

But to see who cares enough to tear those walls down"

~Brooke Davis in One Tree Hill~

66. ongoing process..

it amazed me a lot to realise that

some things that matters so much to me a few months back

is so insignificant now..

it really means nothing to me now!!

looking back,

i felt so foolish to even have make it worth anything..

but then again,

this will always be an ongoing process in my life..

something would be so important to me

and moments later it would seemed all pointless..

65. of hope

how long more do i have to wait

for the rain to stop?

will the rainbow appear then?

how long more do i have to go through

this dark tunnel before i come to the other end?

will i see the light then?

how long more will i have to wait

for the rays of the sun to shine

behind the thick cloud?

will there be a silver lining then?

how long more do i have to wait?

how much more can i endure?

how long more?

64. of pictures

63. trading my sorrows

"though the sorrows may last for the night,

His joy comes with the morning..

His joy will be my strength!!"

62. of rain

the sky was gloomy but i decided to take a walk along the path..

i was enjoying the breeze

when it started to drizzle..

i ran to look for a shelter...

thinking that the rain would stop anytime,

i was too lazy to take the umbrella out of my bag..

as i ran,

the drizzles turned into big droplets of water..

and it continued to rain heavier...

that was when i decided to take my umbrella out

so that i can enjoy my walk under the rain without getting wet..

just as i opened the umbrella,

i found a big hole right at the centre of it..

what was the point of having an umbrella with a big hole when it is raining heavily?

61. of the penny

a man walked along the street and saw a penny.

he didn't pick it up thinking that it was worthless.

what could he possibly do or buy with a penny?

he saw something glittering at the end of the street.

he walked past the penny and headed towards the glittering thing.

when he reached the end of the road,

he realised that it was only pieces of broken glass.

his hopes were shattered like the broken glass.

he walked back to where the penny laid,

but it was not there anymore.

another man had walked away with the penny in his hand, smiling happily.